I woke up with that silly little kids song "If your Happy and you know it" rambling in my head this morning. And got me thinking about happiness. Some of us are born happy. But the rest of us have to work at it to get there. I was a bitter self serving individual when the gospel walked into my life and slapped me into reality. Satan will pull out all stops to make us miserable and unhappy. He knows in the end he will lose and wants as many of us as he can get to be miserable and unhappy with him. So my dear friend, BE HAPPY!
I know its hard some times but you can do it. I joined the church in 1974. It was hard and it took time but the gospel light now fills my soul. Back then I was an alcoholic and that might of been my best quality. My church family gathered around me and prayed and fasted and took me into their homes and I gave up the drink cold turkey. It was bad at first, DT's, the whole ball of wax. But I did it. Satan tried hard to win me back. For 5 years, every sign of trouble I could taste beer. I rarely drank beer, I had gone straight to hard liquor. But Satan still tried to get me to just take another sip. In case you are wondering, 5 years was my refiners fire. I had been married for 4 years and my husband had lost his job and we were reduced to $403 a month unemployment with a $400 on Deed mortgage. If we were 10 days late, we lost our farm. So we were living on $3 a month. My sister got into trouble and loaned us her 3 kids during this time too. We thought we had a year supply but adding in 3 teens wiped it out in just a few months. We passed the kids over to grandpa and went into survival mode. It got so bad we were gleaning fallen corn out of harvested fields to eat. Fallen corn is usually moldy and very nasty. I turned to the Lord and Satan finally gave up on me. More of the gospel light filled my soul. I was getting there but had a ways to go.
We found a family wanting to move into the country so we traded homes with them. We moved into their home in Kansas City. We were there for 2 years. We fixed up their home and sold it and moved into a rental until we got another house in the country. We ended up buying a piece of land and building a small home. We were up to 2 boys at this point.
My husband worked for Ford Motor Company, making cars in their KC plant. The 1979 lay off was the longest one but they always called him back. And to show you that prayer works, a month before our first son was born my husband got called back to work for 3 weeks and then got laid off again. That gave us insurance again for 3 months, enough to cover the hospital and doctor through the end of the pregnancy. I recently ran across the hospital bill for that event and my husband and I both smiled brightly looking at it with the big stamp at the bottom saying "Paid in full by insurance".
Our next refiners fire happened in this house. My husband was unhappy at work, really unhappy. I was expecting son #3 in 1989 when my husband suddenly showed up at home when he should of been at work. He had gotten so mad at work that he quit. But he had gone and joined the Army a couple of weeks before so it was ok, he said. This was more of my husbands refiner fire then mine. He had to redo basic training. My doctor and I decided we didn't want to deal with the military insurance so she induced labor 2 days before my husband shipped out. He shipped out and I was home alone with 3 kids and trying to sell our house. I got it sold in time to meet him in west Texas. I had to pay off some guys bar bill and his wife's bill at the dress shop so they could qualify for the loan but I got it sold. And we got a 4 year vacation from Ford Motor Company. Yeah they took him back 4 years later when my poor husband learned there was something worse then the assembly line.
We finished up that 4 years in Maryland just north of Washington DC. It was an educational experience for our sons. I took them to DC 3 times a week. I volunteered at the Smithsonian so we got to see and do things that others couldn't. We were all ready to go home to Missouri when the 4 years was up. The Army wasn't willing to totally turn lose of him so he had to join the Army Reserve. They had 3 day drills and was a million times worse than the real Army was. After a few months I told my husband to stop going. I knew that would earn him a letter being put into the inactive reserves. I had him then to run up to my old unit of the Missouri Air National Guard and join there. He had cut the tie to the Army and was back in the Air Force. BTW I returned to Missouri expecting twins. My husband was back at Ford (Go UAW!) and doing once a month drills with the guard and life was back on track.
We bought a house back in Ray County on 10 acres in the country. The year was 1993 and it was the year of the flood. I felt like a beached whale. I was so huge I could not drive and my husband had to open both side doors on our van to get me in. The only hospital that would take me was Research Medical center in Kansas City. We got a call from the high way Patrol telling us that the levees along the Missouri were about to break so if we thought it might be time we should run fast to Kansas City now. We did. We made it and it saved my baby girls life. She was in distress and I had no idea. They did an ultrasound as soon as I got to the hospital so they admitted me and did an emergency C-section The date was July 8,1993. The levees actually broke on July 7th. My husband was given a cot in the lobby, he wasn't going anywhere for a few days. My very dear Mother in law had moved in with us a few months before this. My husband is a twin, she knew I'd need help. I really miss my mother in law and my mom. After we left the hospital we drove to the Kansas side to share these new born daughters with my dad as he was in the hospital too. We then had to go out of our way finding the few bridges that survived over the Missouri river to get us back home in northern Ray county. We had friends in harden Missouri was ended up being out of their homes over 8 months due to this flood. This was the town that lost most of their cemetery. But I'm getting lost in my point!
Lots of things happened to put us through our refiners fire. We need these things to make us stronger. The more time we spend reading and studying our scriptures and in prayer the brighter the gospel light will shine in us. Light always over takes darkness. Satan will never win, he knows it. So turn away from his darkness and be happy. Turn away from the tools Satan uses, doubt, discouragement, lack of worth, lies. He pulls all the stops out and try's to throw us off track. Don't let him in! Turn to the light! Turn to Jesus.
A few years ago we got a call from my husbands doctor telling us the cancer was back and spreading. I was so over come I had to run. I had to take me away from my husband so he couldn't see me this discouraged. I grabbed our small tent, the cot bag, the sleeping bag and anything else I could carry and fled to the other side of the lake. Over there I was able to cry a mountain of tears and pray my heart out. It took me 3 days to work through it but I returned to my husband with the bright gospel light glowing and knowing all things are in Christ's hands and with Him I can handle it. We've been led to doctors who were willing to share with us and we are hopeful that we can defeat this cancer with diet and herbs and what ever happens is in His hands.
I'm in the 7th reading of the scriptures. Reading them all the way through each year is the greatest thing I've done. I have a terrible memory so I can't quote scriptures but I know when someone quotes a scripture if they have it right or have taken liberty with it. Every year when I reread the scriptures I continue to have new incites and understanding. I'm in my 60's so my body is wearing out. I know to do any work I have early in the morning. By afternoon I am worn out and just can't do anymore. But I get done what needs to be done and realize I have entered a stage in my life where I can't do everything anymore.
With the gospel light glowing brightly within me and I have peace. I am content and I am happy.
Blessings to you each,